The Green Valley Spa Experience – Day 2 – Trail Mix, Nutrition, and Susan Lucci Infomercials

8.10 am I wake up in the four poster bed at Green Valley Spa. I am surrounded by down. Down comforter. Down pillows. There is even some down thingy under the sheets (is this called a “topper” – all domestically gifted weigh in). Light streams in the room. Sharon, Eydie and I have missed the hike which leaves daily at 7am. We don’t care. We are having to much fun lazing around. To see pictures of the Green Valley Spa accommodations, click here.

Welcome Post    Intro    Post 1    Post 2    Post 3    Post 4    Post 5    Post 6    Last Day   The Afterparty

Here is the room my aunt Sharon and Eydie are staying in (it is one of their residences. Apparently Karl Malone just bought one.)

8.15 am The BIG move. I put my Blackberry on mute and hide all my email, Twitter, and Facebook folders. Freedom. Last year I did not do a great job of detaching. This year I’m on a mission.

8.30 Breakfast. I meet Sharon (my aunt) and Eydie at the dining hall. I can see that Green Valley Spa has a new approach to their menu. Jael, our server, explains that it is free from most wheat and dairy as they are considered “infammatory” and can exacerbate arthritis and lots of other things. I always wondered about that. For instance, I read that Goldie Hawn does not eat wheat or dairy. Anyway, they had me at arthritis. My entire family will ultimately be bionic with knee, hip, and any other things you can have replaced. I’m starting early on my “delaying joint replacement” plan.

Green Valley Spa has about five to seven menu items you can choose from each morning ranging from oatmeal to pancakes to egg whites.

Here is my FEATURED FOOD OF THE DAY: Rice Toast.

We all tasted this rice toast with our egg whites and fruit and – of course -coffee. I kid you not, the rice bread kind of tastes like brioche.

Every year I am amazed to see what is possible within the realm of healthy food. Their food tastes great, and all of it is healthy. Back home, I’ll cook healthy – but, it is a severely boring menu. Green Valley Spa clearly knows they’ve got some stuff figured out, because they have a cookbook in the works. They also teach cooking classes here about once per week. To see some sample menus, click here and look at the right column.

Here is the adorable Jael. She is half Mohawk, half Swedish.

Jael gives us the recipe for the trail mix she makes for the guests:

TRAIL MIX RECIPE

Cashews, almonds, cranberries, dried apple, banana chips (sometimes), pumpkin seeds, cinnamon. Mix with prickly pear syrup and bake on a cookie sheet for 15 to 20 minutes until browned.

9.30-10.30 am – I take a walk around the grounds. I fully planned to take some classes during this time period, however, the roses and honeysuckle – which can be found all over the grounds of the spa – are just so calming. And, hey, that’s what I’m here for.

11.00 am – First appointment: The weird nutrition experiment. Each year at Green Valley Spa I like to try something new and really get into it. My first year it was meditation. Last year it was doing more advanced hikes and some climbing. This year, it’s food. I am going to try something I think – to be honest – sounds totally weird. It is a nutrition/diet plan centered around a hormone. The hormone is what is found in pregnant women (and, have been there and done that twice – so, no risk factor there). There is a doctor and nurse on staff that supervise it and, everyone is walking around here telling me how great they feel, how it works, how it helped with headaches and chronic pain they had. And, oh, did I mention some folks are literally half the size they used to be. I figure:

#1. I have been doing a great job with exercise lately care of my sadistic trainer back home.

#2. Nutrition – Not so great. I have two kids and sometimes feel like I “can’t be bothered.” I do the exact OPPOSITE of what nutrition experts say to do to keep up your metabolism (eat something every 4 to 6 hours). I’ll sometimes have a coffee, then go all day without eating until dinner. This is not good. But, I can’t seem to break the cycle. So, I am relying on Green Valley Spa to help me press the re-start button.

#3.Green Valley Spa is ranked in all these magazines and won awards and is family-owned. Aside from this, I have come inherently trust the staff out here. Thus, I am kind of jumping in with both feet. I think the program is a little weird, but, you know what? So am I.

1.00 pm Lunch. I show up to lunch super-late because of my “weird nutrition experiment” meetings. They accommodate me nonetheless. Thanks Jace.

2.00 pm Stretch class. This is a very popular class at the Spa. It helps undo what you may have done to yourself on the morning hikes, classes, the Vic Braden tennis clinics (I cannot play tennis to save my life, but, mention this for all your tennis fanatics out there who I understand LOVE Vic Braden and the teaching style). Eloise is our teacher. Like all the staff, she has been here for years. Let’s be frank: Eloise is a total babe. But, it’s like she doesn’t know it at all. She has this funny super-casual way of leading the class. At one point, she is doing a stretch and she says “I’m in a lot of pain right now.” I don’t think I’ve EVER heard an instructor say this. And, I used to teach aerobics – I’ve been to A LOT of classes. That, right there, made my day. That woman is FUNNY.

3.00 pm Nap and infomercial. Sharon and Eydie go to a class. They are motivated. This year, I am more motivated to get some sleep. I just am SO EXHAUSTED. Maybe I’m just really relaxed. I fall asleep while watching the “Malibu Pilates by Susan Lucci” infomercial. I have this strange thing where I watch infomercials on vacation. Once I bought a Magic Bullet.

5.15 pm Lymphatic massage. I know the concept of “lymph” is real, because we have lymph nodes. So, I decide to try a lymphatic massage with Malinda. During the massage I start naming my lymph nodes: Sleepy, Dopey, Sneezy, Curly, Larry, Moe….

6.00 pm Dinner. We are laughing and talking and hearing the fascinating story of Marina, a guest who traveled all the way from Greece to be here.

7.00 pm Waterfall treatment. In this treatment, which is OUT OF CONTROL AMAZING, you lie on a private patio area surrounded by trellis work and roses and honeysuckle while they wash your hair, give you a scalp, shoulder, foot, and hand massage. Kim, who has been here for years, is the therapist.

8.30 pm Sharon and Eydie’s room. I head back for my nightly routine of going to Sharon and Eydie’s room for chatting and laughing. Here is what we are laughing about tonight. Sharon brought all of these sticky notes that come pre-printed with messages.

10.00 pm Lights out. There is a hike tomorrow. I read the little “poem of the day” that the staff have put at my bedside along with a tea of the day in a Green Valley Spa mug. I close my eyes, and hope I don’t dream of Susan Lucci’s pilates machine.

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